What a difference a year makes

So, it's the last day of 2006 and I've gotta say this was one hell of a year.

Alot can happen in a year. Now, while nothing truly earth-shattering happened in my life I can look back on 2006 and remember it as the year I got promoted, lost 20kg, became more comfortable with who I am, and learned that while I do have my faults like everyone else, I'm not really such a bad person. Most importantly I think I have learned not to compromise myself and my values to make other people happy.

If you're ever thinking that one year in the context of your whole life is not too long, remember that 12 months ago I looked like this:

I think immediately after this shot I ate the camera then went to McDonalds.

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

Fine thanks, and you?

This is a blatant rip-off of something Brookelina did about 3 months ago. Enjoy.

Here's how it works...Put your iPod or whatever music player you have on shuffle. The first song that you hear will be the song for your Opening Scene. Skip to the next song, this is your next category. Keep doing this until the end.

Opening Scene: This Old Love - Lior
We'll grow old together,
And this love will never,
This old love will never die.

Wake Up Scene: Starlight - Muse
You electrify my life,
Let's conspire to reignite,
All the souls that would die just to feel alive.

Average Day: Anyone - The Feeling
But it wasn't you and it wasn't him,
It was me who fell like a fool right in.

1st Date: Seether - Veruca Salt
Oh, she may not look like other girls,
But she's a snarl-tooth seether.

Falling in Love: Never Be Lonely - The Feeling
People in love get scared and stupid,
People in love get everything wrong,
But at least they'll never be lonely.

Fight Scene: Electric Blue - Icehouse
Are you hiding somewhere behind those eyes?
I just freeze everytime you see through me,
And it's all over you - electric blue.

Break Up Scene: Same Old Stuff - The Feeling
I thought it was obvious,
My love we're made of the same old stuff.
It's not hard, just look at how close we are,
Instead of how far.

Back together: Tonight You Belong To Me - Nancy Sinatra
How sweet it will seem,
Once more just to dream in the moonlight,
My honey I know with the dawn that you will be gone.

Secret Love: Be My Baby - Travis
The night we met I knew I needed you so,
And if I had the chance I'd never let you go.
So won't you say you love me?

Life's OK: Light Surrounding You - Evermore
I want you to know that I see the light surrounding you,
So don't be afraid of something new.
'Cause I see the light surrounding you,
So don't be afraid of what you're turning into.

Mental Breakdown: Lovesong - Amiel
Thanks, you've been fuel for thought,
Now I'm more lonely than before
But that's OK, I've just ready made another fucking love song.

Driving: Move Along - The All-American Rejects
All the pain held in your hands
Are shaking cold,
Your hands are mine to hold.

Learning a Lesson: Daughters - John Mayer
You see that skin? It's the same she's been standing in
Since the day she saw him walking away,
Now she's left to clean up the mess he made.

Deep Thought: Make Your Own Kind of Music - Mama Cass
You've gotta make your own kind of music,
Sing your own special song,
Make your own kind of music,
Even if nobody else sings along.

Flashback: You Give Me Something - James Morrison
You give me something that makes me scared, alright.
This could be nothing,
But I'm willing to give it a try.

Partying: If I Had a Tattoo - Tripod
If I had a tattoo, I would get one of you -
Or at least of a generic woman's body,
And draw your head on with a texta.

Happy Dance: The Goonies R Good Enough - Cyndi Lauper
Oh it's not real if you don't feel it,
Unspoken expectations, ideas you used to play with,
They're finally taking shape for us.

Regretting: Never Ever - All Saints
I'll keep searching deep within my soul,
For all the answers, don't wanna hurt no more.

Long Night Alone: Big Bang Baby - Stone Temple Pilots
Is this what life and love is all about?
I think I think so.

Death Scene: Mind's Eye - Wolfmother
I've been searching for a little more,
Though the days just slip away.

Closing Credits: Everybody's Changing - Keane
So little time, try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game,
I try to stay awake and remember my name,
But everybody's changing and I don't feel the same.

So what?

I'm going to say something here that will shock and dismay all of you.
I lost this CD for about 5 years or so, and today I just found it again.

And it makes me very happy. I don't care what you think.

Remember that time I adopted a sheep?

What is truly sad about it is that she doesn't actually come to live with me, like orphans do in such films as Annie, and Anne of Green Gables. What happens instead is that my dear sheepy stays on the farm with her sheep friends and sheep family, but gets to eat food for a little bit longer. If adopting sheep is something that interests you, go here.

The most exciting thing that has happened to me this week is that I got a new mobile phone - Motorola KRZR. This little piece of my blue heaven arouses me more than the thought of showering with Johnny Depp.

I think I have finally finished all of my Christmas shopping - and even if I haven't I simply don't care. If I forgot to get anyone a gift they will just have to deal with it and hate me, because I'm not going back to the shops. Well, maybe to Big W but that's just because they have self-service checkouts and using them gives me a bit of a buzz.

My Life in Bullet Form

• I can't seem to put my doona away for the summer. The temperature fluctuates every day so that even though I'm using the air conditioner to get to sleep tonight, tomorrow night I'll be wrapped up in the doona again like an enchilada.
• I have been watching Friends on DVD - we now have all 10 seasons - and I've decided that the funniest one they ever made was "The One Where Everybody Finds Out". Find it. Watch it. Love it.
• I finally started my Christmas shopping! I'm a bit bored with it now though.
• I'm alarmed that time seems to be moving very quickly and very slowly at the same time.
• I have the best eyebrows ever at the moment. I live in fear of the beautician deforming me with strange eyebrows, but by some fluke they are almost the exact colour of my hair (yes, I have to get them tinted, alright?!) and perfectly shaped. I should buy the beautician something for Christmas.
• Why must it be 27 degrees at 9pm? That's clearly daytime weather. You're dreaming of gorgonzola cheese, when it's clearly brie time, baby. Step into my office!
  
• Sometimes I get the urge to slap other people's children. Usually while shopping. Can I?
• I'm kind of addicted to this dumb game.
• It's really hard to get motivated to straighten your hair with a flat iron that is about 8000 degrees in this weather. My motivation not to look like an electrocuted poodle is quite high though, so it all balances out.
• Wow, this was exactly as boring as I hoped it wouldn't be.
• I'm too hot for this shit!
  

I'll explain it with pictures

Fill my little world right up, right up

Australia Post is holding my Arrested Development Season 3 hostage. If the dumb as shit postman is too dumb as shit to leave my parcel at the post office, why must he tease me by leaving one of those "please pick up your parcel from the post office" slips in my mailbox? Thank god it wasn't a kidney I was waiting on or I would not be here right now writing this titillating post for you. I've used the word "post" 5 times already. Now it's six.

I've gone totally insane with food this week, and true to form everytime I cut loose and eat junk and crap I have a gallstone attack - approximately a 19.4 out of 10 on the pain scale. You'd think that alone would encourage me to behave, but I am feeling completely out of control at the moment so I would have to say that strategy is not working. Have to go back to being a saint tomorrow, I guess. I'm too scared to go back to Weight Watchers this week, but there's no hiding from it next week.

It's really difficult to get motivated enough to do anything laborious at this time of year. I think today I did about 4 minutes of actual work, 2 hours of birthday cake preparations, 1 hour of personal call time, 87 minutes of staring at my desk and/or a piece of paper, and the balance of the time on personal emails. But you'd better believe I'll be expecting a pay increase in the new year, even if it's only for my talent at making all of that seem like a stressful, busy day.

Why is the rum always gone?

I don't know why this amuses me so...

But it does.

Attempted Murder

Last night a bottle of vodka tried to kill me.
I hope to win the war, but at the moment I am focussing on winning one battle at a time. For example, I have not vomited - victory is mine! I fell asleep on the couch, fully clothed, on top of my pyjamas and hugging a blanket I had not yet unfolded - victory is vodka's. Besides the fact that my head is in the process of cracking into 5 pieces I seem to be doing OK now, and I am absolutely never drinking again until next weekend at my sister's 30th birthday party.